Ticketless Travel

Not usually one for nostalgia, I shall miss the airline ticket when it retires next year...

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/travel/main.jhtml?xml=/travel/2007/09/01/et-airline-tickets-101.xml

EasyJet offer nonsense-wrapped discounts

EasyJet are having a 24-hour promotion that promises to offer various discounts on flights destined for many of the cities that In Your Pocket covers. So we thought we'd let you know. The discounts, that seem to change every hour, range from a paltry five per cent off the price of your ticket to... erm... something more exciting that we haven't seen yet. Yay! (Or something.)

Mile-high club

Silverjet, a business-class airline that flies between London (Luton) and New York (Newark), has women-only toilets, as their new viral ad points out:

Bucharest Baneasa Airport to Close

Europe's worst airport, Bucharest Baneasa, is finally going to get a face lift. Planes due to take off from and land at Baneasa (mainly those of budget airlines) will be using Bucharest Otopeni during the closure.

It is rumoured in travel industry circles that improvements to Baneasa have come at the request of easyJet, who want to begin services there but have refused to do so with the airport currently creaking under the strain of handling oh, at least 12 flights a day.

BA: First class for corpse

BA's decision to upgrade a corpse to a first class seat has attracted just a little media attention. So we thought we'd jump on the bandwagon.

When a cattle-class passenger died shortly after take-off, BA cabin crew decided to upgrade the
septuagenarian stiff to first class, much to the chagrin of fellow first class passenger Paul Trinder. Wailing relatives were then invited to follow, further exacerbating the discomfort of the full-fare paying first class passenger. The dead body had to be propped up with pillows to prevent it sliding out of its seat.

We don't want to get into the debate about the rights of passengers versus the rights of dead bodies or grieving relatives, but it is interesting to note that the Times (London) article about the incident has become one of the most read and most commented on their website. It taps into themes of 'We hate BA' (quite popular) as well as 'aren't first class passengers selfish bastards'. One contributor even warned of the dangers of the body becoming 'undead'.

The story was also covered in the Daily Mail, The Mirror, and (one of our favourites, although admittedly a bit geeky,) The Register.

Interesting reading, if you've got time to kill.

In a related story, an American man called Mr Whipple has been rewarded for peeing in a sick bag.

Flying fat

I've just read an interesting article from the LA Times on the design of airline seats. While the whole article is worthwhile (have a read yourself), the bit that caught my eye was this:

"Since the 1960s — the dawn of the jet age — the average American has become an inch taller and 25 pounds heavier ..."

Twenty-five pounds, by the way is something like 11kg. That's a lot of extra baggage. They really are larding-up over there, the fatties. The article also says that ...

Boeing guidelines, which comply with those of the Federal Aviation Administration, allow for 185 pounds [84kg] per passenger, 20 [9kg] of that for carry-on baggage.

And then there's the fact that fatties are pushing up fuel costs:

... in 2000 alone those added pounds that passengers had packed on since the '60s cost airlines US$275 million for 350 million more gallons of fuel.

Now, what gets me a bit riled by all this is all those fatties (regardless of nationality) who come waddling onto planes with way too much carry-on baggage and, probably, mountains of luggage in the hold. Those of us who are light, and travel light, are not only making sacrifices for but also paying for these flying walrusses.

But, when I check-in, can I take a few extra kilos in my luggage because I am skinny? No way. Do I get a discount because I will incurr lower fuel costs? Erm... nope.

I know it's a difficult issue, and there really is no solution because you can't discriminate against fat people (and besides, muscle weighs more than fat, and I don't want to discriminate against big muscly people either) but it is just very annoying for normal (non-fat) people.

It's just very annoying that if I want to take a little extra weight onto a plane, in my luggage, I have to pay extra. And yet, I know, there will be some fat, waddling, jelly-tubby blob who won't be charged an extra cent for his or her extra weight. It's simply not fair. What do you think?

BTW - If any fat people are reading this and would like to loose weight, I've invented a new diet that could help. It follows this simple principle: eat less, do more. Simple, huh? You see, it's all about calories and... erm... oh, forget it, you're probably not listening anyway. Have another 'donut'.

An extra fiver or you don't fly

Pic from flickr / thegingerpimpernel.

People who bought airline tickets online prior to December last year for flights departing the UK after the end of January this year are being asked to pay an extra five pounds to cover an increase in Air Passenger Duty. This is covered in The Times, but what is not mentioned is how passengers of non-UK based airlines like airBaltic, flyLAL and Wizz will be affected. Add a comment if you have any experience, and we'll update this post if we find out.